Your 2014 Style Upgrade: The Big Chop

22 Jan

ImageLately Lupita Nyong’o, star of the movie 12 Years a Slave and recent SAG and Critics Choice awards, has been gracing the spotlight. Not only is she a talented and award-winning rising actress, fashion gurus are bowing down as she collects her awards.

And she does it all flawlessly with a beautiful buzzed cut.

Last year, Top 7 Perks of Shaving Your Head was one of the most-read posts. So I figured it’s about time I did another post on the subject of hair, just in case you weren’t convinced by Lupita’s flawless presence and my previous post.

When I’m in public, lots of women come up to me expressing their desire to have my haircut. They all usually same something like, “I wish I could cut my hair, but __________ (insert lame excuse here).” I tell them that they can pull it off, but they never believe me. So I guess its time I stop being nice: Ladies, cut the crap. If you want to do it, now is definitely the time. Let it be your big step of 2014, since I know some of y’all already failed at your New Year’s resolutions, while others decided not to make any because they knew they wouldn’t follow through.

YES YOU CAN survive the Big Chop and wear it beautifully.

So let’s address those lame excuses:

Humpty Dumpty Blues: My head is lumpy/ awkwardly shaped
Some of us have dents and ridges in our heads, myself included. That’s an easy fix: don’t shave your head completely bald. Leave about a half of a centimeter (maybe not even that much), just enough to cover the lumps. I was personally concerned about my lumps when I decided to shave my head nearly bald one day—but I got over it.  No one comes over to examine my head for inconsistencies.

Bratz Doll Syndrome: My Head is too big

GRACE JONES

Grace Jones

To be honest, it probably isn’t. And if it is that big, the hair on your head right not probably hiding that fact either. Big heads can be bald too. Wear big earrings and accessories.

He or She?: I’ll look like a boy
Yes you will—and at the same time, no you won’t. That really depends on your bone structure. Gender is a a societal construct and androgyny is in style right now anyway. You’ll be on that Grace Jones/Janelle Monae look. 

Samesies Boredom: I want variety
Even with your hair as short as mine, you can mix it up. How many colors did Amber Rose have when she wore buzz cuts?

A ROSE BLONDEA ROSE MIX

Or you could go with a more natural honey brown dye. Or do like Grace Jones: vary it in lengths and shapes, add texturizer, sculpt designs. Get creative.

I think everyone should cut off their hair at least once, just for the freedom and experience. Unless you’re super attached like those Top Model contestants that cry when Tyra gives them makeovers. Or you just really don’t want to. I’m not a Natural Hair Nazi; Do what you do. I’m talking to the ladies who’ve ever considered it but are hesitant. Buzz cuts are easy, freeing, and look good all the time. If you need more reasons to cut your hair, check out my other post on buzz cuts.

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Curb Your Ignorance: What NOT to ask a Transgender Person

16 Jan

Laverne Cox

If you haven’t yet heard of Laverne Cox, let me put you on:

  • First African-American transgender woman to produce and star in her own television show.
  • Current star of Orange is the New Black
  • Transgender Advocate
  • Master of shutting down ignorant questions

Recently Ms. Cox appeared as a guest on Katie Couric’s talk show alongside transgender supermodel and TV personality Carmen Carrera. When Katie talked to the women about the question of genitalia (asking why many transgender people don’t like when you ask about their genitalia), Laverne magnificently explained why those types of questions are not okay.

She says (at 2:20 in the video),

“That preoccupation…objectifies trans people and then we don’t get to deal with the real lived experiences. The reality of trans people lives is that so often we’re targets of violence. We experience discrimination disproportionately to the rest of the community and our unemployment rate is twice the national average…When we focus on transition, we don’t get to talk about those things.”

While Laverne spoke I was taken back to a few months ago at my Ms. magazine internship. I was assigned to fact-check a piece on International Transgender Day of Remembrance. The day is set aside annually to memorialize people who are killed because of hatred and prejudice toward transgender people.

While fact-checking, I printed out the statistics of trans* people who were murdered. The printer kept going and going, and eventually I had to add more paper. When it finally stopped, I held a thick stack of paper, with names, ages, and the gruesome details of thousands of murdered people. A 13 year old stoned to death in Brazil, a 22 year old choked with a chain and set on fire in Wisconsin, another woman stabbed and beheaded in Mexico are all included on the list.

As Laverne explained, the seriousness of the situation is overlooked when people ask trivial questions (And why would you ask anyone about their genitals? That’s just not acceptable in most settings).

Yes I know—some of us uninformed cisgender people like to ask a lot of questions. But sometimes our curiosity is unappreciated. It sort of reminds me of the times ignorant Argentines asked if my skin was harder because it was darker than their own. I would roll my eyes, shake my head and let them touch the skin on the back of my hand (which happens to be baby soft, fyi). Questions like that one and the ones posed at trans people about their genitalia serve to “other” the person on the receiving end of the question. It’s like questioning someone’s humanity while using yourself as the standard.

Knowing some of my readers personally, I’d like to acknowledge that some of us have certain prejudices towards transgender people. Yet, we can’t be all for women’s equality and racial equality and then stand against transgender people who share similar experiences that we face: discrimination in the workplace (and every other place), disproportional targets of violence, and just all around rudeness from ignorant folks.

Anyways, for informing people about the severity of these issues and shutting down unwanted questions about transgender people, Laverne Cox is AWW’s  Super Woman of the Month.

Thank you Laverne

If you’d like to be a better trans* ally, I’d suggest you hear more from transgender people. As a cisgender woman, I can only say so much and I do not have the lived experience. So check out these related posts written by transgender women:

13 Myths And Misconceptions About Trans Women
Trans Etiquette 101: No Offense, But That’s Offensive

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Your Top Posts of 2013…Did You Miss Any?

30 Dec

With over 20,000 views in 121 countries, 2013 has been an amazing year for A Womyn’s Worth.  I used to get excited when 15 people read my post per day. Imagine my surprise when I woke up to see 800 views one morning, and 3,000 that evening for some of my top posts. AWW did awesome for its first year.

In case you missed any, here’s a look back at a few of readers’ favorite posts from 2013.

A SHORTSI Wear Short Shorts BECAUSE I’m a Feminist (6,090 views)
“What is wrong with a woman being sexy? If she loves her body,  then she has the right to dress it as she pleases.

No one should have to alter their appearance to fit into what society believes is the “appropriate” or “respectable” way a woman should dress. In my understanding, part of being a feminist means loving yourself enough that you express yourself however you want and allowing others to do the same.”

9 Totally Appropriate Responses to “You Don’t Act/Sound Black” (5,200+ views)
A handy list of responses in case someone decides that you aren’t a legit Black person. (I say it’s an appropriate list—but appropriateness is relative. You be the judge.)

This Week’s Most Offensive Internet Meme
back women COMPARISON“There’s a reason you haven’t heard much about the ambitious Black women of 2013. Women like Moya Bailey, Tatyana Fazlalizadeh, Melissa Harris-Perry, and Sil Lai Abrams aren’t trending on reality TV, Vine, Worldstar, and Youtube because they don’t fit certain stereotypes. Kanye isn’t going to feature those women in his music videos and Tyler Perry will write them in his script as heartless bitches simply because they are powerful.”

You Can Find Me in Da Club—but Don’t Touch Me!
“When did my body become public property? Just because my ass is big doesn’t mean you have license to grab it.”

YES YOU CAN: Twerk and Have a Brain
“Welcome to this week’s episode of ‘How Not to be a Feminist,’ starring Lily Allen.LILY ALLEN2

She sings about how women in the industry are objectified—and then she turns right around and objectifies the backup dancers, who are mostly black women.

The message is clear: It’s not okay to objectify women, unless they’re women of color.”

Feminism Gets a Bad Facelift
Rebrand“Originally, the Rebranding Feminism Contest looked like another bad facelift on a type of feminism that is no stranger to the back-alley plastic surgeon—a type of feminism whose privileged members seek to revamp the movement, yet, blindly fail to address the experiences of women of color, the LGBT community, low-income workers, and full-time mothers. Yes, maybe this type of feminism should seek an upgrade.”

Am I Black Enough?
“The ‘problem’ is: I don’t fit the stereotype of what the media says a Black woman should be. The societal definition of what it means to be Black (which is dangerously similar to the racist 19th Century beliefs of colonial powers) is how some of us define ourselves…

So I’m not going to define myself by racist standards of what it means to be Black—because you can’t be genuine if others are still defining who you are.”

Top 20 Things You Must Do in Your Twenties
“Now that I’ve supposedly entered ‘the real world’ and am considered an ADULT (even though I don’t feel like one), I’ve wanted to create a checklist for Twenty-Somethings. So I asked many women (and a few men), ages 21-82, what they think we should do in our twenties.” Do you have these things on your checklist?

Wanting to be a Big Booty Hoe
BIGBOOTY HOE“As women, many of us are all taught at young ages —either from our parents, magazines, music, or the world around us—that part of our duty is to be pleasing to the eye. Scholars Sheila Lintott and Sherri Irvin explain in “Sex Objects and Sexy Subjects: A Feminist Reclamation of Sexiness,” women are socialized to believe that being sexy is essential to their value as human beings, and that only certain looks are defined as sexy. When someone fails to adhere to those narrow standards of sexy she may be viewed as less of a woman.

That is how I felt when I looked in the mirror and saw my lack of curves: I was less sexy; I was less of a woman.”

Welcome to Slut Shamer Rehab
“We’ve all done it: Shook our heads at the girl who decided to dress in a way that was too provocative for our own good taste, while in the back of our minds thought, “Where are the rest of her clothes?” Then we’d mentally label her a slut or skank, and if we were mean enough, we would give her a stank face and utter a few words under our breath. We’d stand high and mighty in our not-so-skanky stilettos and turn our noses up at the “slut” who dared leave the house and enter our wholesome presence showing all her goodies.”

Top Woman Rappers You NEED On Your Playlist
ANGEL HAZE“If you were challenged to name as many current women rappers as you can and then asked to do the same for male rappers, I’m guessing your list would be pretty heavy with testosterone. I bet you could name a few veteran rappers, like Foxy Brown, Lil Kim, Missy Elliott, and Remy Ma — but not too many artists making music now.”

News Flash: Women rappers are NOT an endangered species.

Top 7 Perks of Shaving Your Head
BALDWOMEN“As bald and buzzed cuts become increasingly popular, women are daring to shave their heads. I’ve worn a buzzed cut for nearly 3 years, and I have to say: it’s been a psychological, emotional, and amusing experience. I had to adjust to a different look and reactions that I got because of the new look. Hair is major part of a person’s identity, and there are implications whenever someone drastically changes their hair. And honestly, there are so many advantages to having no hair.”

A Womyn’s Worth  is successful because of its readers. For all of you who’ve ever shared a post on Facebook, I’m so grateful My stats increase by the hundreds with every share. Seriously, THANK YOU!

Next year we will continue with more intriguing and necessary discussions on Black feminism,  pop culture, sexual politics, hip hop, race, and everything in between. Thanks again for reading and sharing :).

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