Tag Archives: Black women

Your 2014 Style Upgrade: The Big Chop

22 Jan

ImageLately Lupita Nyong’o, star of the movie 12 Years a Slave and recent SAG and Critics Choice awards, has been gracing the spotlight. Not only is she a talented and award-winning rising actress, fashion gurus are bowing down as she collects her awards.

And she does it all flawlessly with a beautiful buzzed cut.

Last year, Top 7 Perks of Shaving Your Head was one of the most-read posts. So I figured it’s about time I did another post on the subject of hair, just in case you weren’t convinced by Lupita’s flawless presence and my previous post.

When I’m in public, lots of women come up to me expressing their desire to have my haircut. They all usually same something like, “I wish I could cut my hair, but __________ (insert lame excuse here).” I tell them that they can pull it off, but they never believe me. So I guess its time I stop being nice: Ladies, cut the crap. If you want to do it, now is definitely the time. Let it be your big step of 2014, since I know some of y’all already failed at your New Year’s resolutions, while others decided not to make any because they knew they wouldn’t follow through.

YES YOU CAN survive the Big Chop and wear it beautifully.

So let’s address those lame excuses:

Humpty Dumpty Blues: My head is lumpy/ awkwardly shaped
Some of us have dents and ridges in our heads, myself included. That’s an easy fix: don’t shave your head completely bald. Leave about a half of a centimeter (maybe not even that much), just enough to cover the lumps. I was personally concerned about my lumps when I decided to shave my head nearly bald one day—but I got over it.  No one comes over to examine my head for inconsistencies.

Bratz Doll Syndrome: My Head is too big

GRACE JONES

Grace Jones

To be honest, it probably isn’t. And if it is that big, the hair on your head right not probably hiding that fact either. Big heads can be bald too. Wear big earrings and accessories.

He or She?: I’ll look like a boy
Yes you will—and at the same time, no you won’t. That really depends on your bone structure. Gender is a a societal construct and androgyny is in style right now anyway. You’ll be on that Grace Jones/Janelle Monae look. 

Samesies Boredom: I want variety
Even with your hair as short as mine, you can mix it up. How many colors did Amber Rose have when she wore buzz cuts?

A ROSE BLONDEA ROSE MIX

Or you could go with a more natural honey brown dye. Or do like Grace Jones: vary it in lengths and shapes, add texturizer, sculpt designs. Get creative.

I think everyone should cut off their hair at least once, just for the freedom and experience. Unless you’re super attached like those Top Model contestants that cry when Tyra gives them makeovers. Or you just really don’t want to. I’m not a Natural Hair Nazi; Do what you do. I’m talking to the ladies who’ve ever considered it but are hesitant. Buzz cuts are easy, freeing, and look good all the time. If you need more reasons to cut your hair, check out my other post on buzz cuts.

Tags: , , , , , ,

Curb Your Ignorance: What NOT to ask a Transgender Person

16 Jan

Laverne Cox

If you haven’t yet heard of Laverne Cox, let me put you on:

  • First African-American transgender woman to produce and star in her own television show.
  • Current star of Orange is the New Black
  • Transgender Advocate
  • Master of shutting down ignorant questions

Recently Ms. Cox appeared as a guest on Katie Couric’s talk show alongside transgender supermodel and TV personality Carmen Carrera. When Katie talked to the women about the question of genitalia (asking why many transgender people don’t like when you ask about their genitalia), Laverne magnificently explained why those types of questions are not okay.

She says (at 2:20 in the video),

“That preoccupation…objectifies trans people and then we don’t get to deal with the real lived experiences. The reality of trans people lives is that so often we’re targets of violence. We experience discrimination disproportionately to the rest of the community and our unemployment rate is twice the national average…When we focus on transition, we don’t get to talk about those things.”

While Laverne spoke I was taken back to a few months ago at my Ms. magazine internship. I was assigned to fact-check a piece on International Transgender Day of Remembrance. The day is set aside annually to memorialize people who are killed because of hatred and prejudice toward transgender people.

While fact-checking, I printed out the statistics of trans* people who were murdered. The printer kept going and going, and eventually I had to add more paper. When it finally stopped, I held a thick stack of paper, with names, ages, and the gruesome details of thousands of murdered people. A 13 year old stoned to death in Brazil, a 22 year old choked with a chain and set on fire in Wisconsin, another woman stabbed and beheaded in Mexico are all included on the list.

As Laverne explained, the seriousness of the situation is overlooked when people ask trivial questions (And why would you ask anyone about their genitals? That’s just not acceptable in most settings).

Yes I know—some of us uninformed cisgender people like to ask a lot of questions. But sometimes our curiosity is unappreciated. It sort of reminds me of the times ignorant Argentines asked if my skin was harder because it was darker than their own. I would roll my eyes, shake my head and let them touch the skin on the back of my hand (which happens to be baby soft, fyi). Questions like that one and the ones posed at trans people about their genitalia serve to “other” the person on the receiving end of the question. It’s like questioning someone’s humanity while using yourself as the standard.

Knowing some of my readers personally, I’d like to acknowledge that some of us have certain prejudices towards transgender people. Yet, we can’t be all for women’s equality and racial equality and then stand against transgender people who share similar experiences that we face: discrimination in the workplace (and every other place), disproportional targets of violence, and just all around rudeness from ignorant folks.

Anyways, for informing people about the severity of these issues and shutting down unwanted questions about transgender people, Laverne Cox is AWW’s  Super Woman of the Month.

Thank you Laverne

If you’d like to be a better trans* ally, I’d suggest you hear more from transgender people. As a cisgender woman, I can only say so much and I do not have the lived experience. So check out these related posts written by transgender women:

13 Myths And Misconceptions About Trans Women
Trans Etiquette 101: No Offense, But That’s Offensive

Tags: , , , ,

This Week’s Most Offensive Internet Meme

6 Dec

While mindlessly procrastinating on Facebook the other day, I found this repulsive image:

Image

For me, it was a huge slap in face. Yet the meme trended on Instagram and Facebook and had over 3,000 shares.

People praised its “truthfulness” and talked about how young Black women need to take a lesson from women of the past. While I don’t disagree that we should know our history, the execution of this message was poor. The meme makes four ridiculously flawed assumptions about today’s Black women.

Assumption #1: Twerking is the evilest thing in the world*

The discussion on twerking is an interesting one and I’m on the fence. But for now I’ll say this: there’s nothing inherently wrong with twerking. It’s a dance that requires skill and technique.

Yes, it’s sexual—so is tango, which has origins related to prostitution. So was the Can-can when it first came out. Even the belly dance and African dance classes I took as a child can be viewed as sexual when taken out of context.  In the past, these dances were frowned upon because they originated from marginalized groups. The views of dances like tango and twerking are often directly related to the privileged classes’ views of the working class and/or ethnic groups.

Also, we should watch the way we police women’s creative expression—it’s not a crime to be sexual.

On the other hand, the train may not have been the best place to initiate a twerking session—though it wasn’t harming anyone on the train (except maybe the other black women who were worried about being lumped into one massive stereotype, which happens whether people twerk on trains or not).

Assumption #2:  Black women are the same

I think it’s safe to assume that not all Black women twerk on trains. I know I’m not that bold. Not all Black women even know how to twerk (sorry to burst your bubble).

Yet, the way Black women are portrayed in media is the way people, including other Black people, view us as a whole. And the fact that this meme got praise from tons of Black folks shows the media’s negative effect on our own views of our culture.

Quit buying into the nonsense that all black women act a certain way and start looking into media that celebrates the successful ventures of Black women today. Try Clutch Magazine to begin with. They have a whole section called “She’s So Ambitious,” which highlights successes of Black woman entrepreneurs.

Assumption #3: Black women are no longer fighting for equality

There’s a reason you haven’t heard much about the ambitious Black women of 2013. Women like Mikki Kendall, Moya Bailey, Tatyana Fazlalizadeh, Corvida Raven, Leana Cabral, Melissa Harris-Perry, and Sil Lai Abrams, aren’t trending on reality TV, Vine, Worldstar, and Youtube because they don’t fit certain stereotypes. Kanye isn’t going to feature those women in his music videos and Tyler Perry will write them in his script as heartless bitches simply because they are powerful.

The meme completely invalidates the work of the many women I mentioned above, and all the others who like them. Most of those women are fighting for the similar cause of equality that the women in the 1960’s did.

Assumption 4: Black women are one-dimensional

As I discussed in a recent post, women can twerk, get advanced degrees, and have successful careers all at the same time. We are more complex than the Ratchet Hoe vs. Educated Sister dichotomy people seem to have engrained in their minds.

I love the philosophy  of one of my cousins and her friends, who refer  to themselves as “Sophistiratch” because they have a lot of fun and do things that people may deem “ratchet,” while at the same time, they all have degrees and are pursuing careers.

All in all, viewing this meme’s portrayal of Black women as authentic makes you no better than Lily Allen—who views us as twerking objects to be smacked on the butt, mocked for our bodies, and then shamed for our behavior (yet, never applauded for our accomplishments).

When I tried to find memes for this post, I couldn’t find any “Educated Black Woman” or “Successful Black Woman” memes. Of course, “Ghetto Black Girl” and “Stereotypical Black Girl” were readily available. So here’s one I created:

 MULTIF FINAL

Feel free to share it. In the future I hope there are more positive memes for Black women and that these horrific ones cease to spread.

What do you all think of the 2 memes?

Meme photos courtesy of Advance Path, Sarah L. Wilson, and Johnathan Hartford via Flickr. 

*Yes, my views on twerking have changed since I’ve done more research on respectability politics as it relates to race. While I stand by my argument in Sorority Girls must Twerk, people shouldn’t assume that women twerk because of the oppressive demands of us to embody sexual objects. People twerk because they are having a good time or celebrating, among other reasons.

P.S. This article is part of the Top Posts. Check out the Best of A Womyn’s Worth. 

Tags: , , , ,

← Older Entries
Newer Entries →