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I Wear Short Shorts BECAUSE I’m a Feminist

19 Jul

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#IWearShortShorts #FierceFeminism

The other day I was sitting in a restaurant next to a man and I heard him say: “That girl’s shorts are too short. Looks like her daddy’s just preparing her for the stripper pole.” The girl and her father didn’t hear the comment, but I felt sick to my stomach. I was angry, but I didn’t really know what to say to him—I just knew he was wrong.

The very next week, the NY Daily News posted a picture of Sasha Obama in short shorts, and the media attacked Sasha, saying her clothes were “inappropriate.” Sasha Obama Shorts

Clutch Magazine ran Sasha’s story on their site, and commenters both defended and criticized Sasha’s clothing choice.  However, one commenter argued, “The real question shouldn’t be why little girls wear shorts, President’s daughter or not, but should be: why are grown people sexualizing little girls?”

I agree. Sasha and the girl I saw are just girls in shorts. The adult commenters are the ones sexualizing little girls. So if you have a problem with girls wearing short shorts, you should probably stop attributing sexual characteristics to them and just let them live their lives.

I’ve heard the argument that we must teach young girls to cover up in order to avoid being objectified. Yet, we really need to get out of this “she was asking for it” mindset. Instead of teaching girls to cover up in order to avoid perverts or judgment from others, we should teach others to stop poaching on children. I know it’s a reach because our society is very quick to blame the woman—but wearing short shorts is harmless. It doesn’t create danger for bystanders. It doesn’t kill innocent people. It’s kind of like the slogan “instead of teaching women to avoid rape, teach men not to rape.” Instead of telling girls to cover up, let’s encourage everyone not to sexualize them.

I’ve also heard the argument that young girls shouldn’t be allowed to wear revealing attire because they’re growing up too fast. I get that. Maybe girls are growing up fast, but come on—it’s not the literal clothing that’s making them grow up faster. If they are “fast girls” they are fast whether they wear revealing clothes or not. The clothes aren’t making them fast. I’d blame that on a combination of things: an overdose of sex-oriented advertisements marketed to young girls, poor role models in pop culture, lack of self-confidence and maturity, and so much more. Forcing a young girl to put on less revealing clothing doesn’t change the way she feels about herself, nor does it change her behavior.

Also, the judgment doesn’t stop when girls get older. Grown women who show a lot of skin are constantly shamed and deemed “slutty.”

We do it to one another. We shame other women based on how much cleavage is showing or how short their dress is because have been raised in a society that teaches that overtly sexy women are “impure” and deserve less respect. So we police their behavior and their appearance, label them sluts, and ook upon them as if they is stupid or broken.

But seriously—What is wrong with a woman being sexy? If she loves her body,  then she has the right to dress it as she pleases.

No one should have to alter their appearance to fit into what society believes is the “appropriate” or “respectable” way a woman should dress. In my understanding, part of being a feminist means loving yourself enough that you express yourself however you want, and allowing others to do the same.

Feminists challenge the ideas about women who show their bodies being “impure” or not worthy of respect. Therefore, I wear short shorts because I am a feminist (and for several other reasons—see amateur poetry below).

I wear short shorts because I am a feminist.

I wear short shorts because I want to, and because no one else can tell me what to do with my body.

I wear short shorts because it’s hot outside.

I wear short shorts because I love my body.

I wear short shorts because they are part of my outfit.

I wear short shorts because I like attention.

I wear short shorts because I’m sexy, and no, I am not “asking for it.”

I wear short shorts because I can— Get the f*ck over it.

You have to know that what I’m saying is not that revolutionary of a concept. Thousands of women partake in yearly Slut Walks, protest marches that calls for an end to slut shaming and rape culture.  Some feminists have even embraced the term “slut” in an attempt to reappropriate its meaning. Sluts now have their own website (What’s up Slutist!). Internationally, women have fought against slut-shaming and victim-blaming. Yet, it is difficult to protest sexist ideas that have existed in our society for centuries.

To contribute to this discussion on slut-shaming, for the next few weeks, my posts will be catered to body and sexual politics. In addition, I will utilize my facebook, pintrest, and tumblr for my “I Wear Short Shorts” mini photo-campaign.

For further reading on body politics and all things sluttty, check out Slutist.com.

The Pressure to be Pretty

26 Jun

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“You Don’t Have to be Pretty”

It sometimes takes me around 35 minutes to pick out an outfit. It seems I am never satisfied with the first few I try on—so I try on more and more clothes. By the end of my fashion rampage, half of the clothes in my closet are on the floor, my room is a complete mess, and I’ve gone through at least six outfits. Eventually, I have to throw something on, dash off to wherever I’m headed and hope to arrive on time. This used to happen 4 or 5 times a week.

Sound like anyone you know?

I don’t always leave the house proud of what I have on. Sometimes it’s just not good enough. I sometimes don’t feel stylish enough, edgy enough, or pretty enough.

Recently, I came across this quote:

“You Don’t Have to Be Pretty. You don’t owe prettiness to anyone. Not to your boyfriend/spouse/partner, not to your co-workers, especially not to random men on the street. You don’t owe it to your mother, you don’t owe it to your children, you don’t owe it to civilization in general. Prettiness is not a rent you pay for occupying a space marked ‘female.’”

 -From Erin McKean, creator of the blog A Dress a Day

I have always felt the pressure to be pretty—haven’t we all?

That is why many of us spend so much time getting ready in the mornings. In my mind, its like: I must leave the house looking fabulous or else…

We are taught (often at dangerously early ages) that we are supposed to be pretty. And if we do not, we will have less fun, we will never date and get married, and we will fail as women. Of course, most people don’t say that out loud, but it’s part of our society’s consciousness. No one comments on the bags under Bill Clinton’s eyes, yet everyone has something to say about Hilary’s pants suits. No one cares how handsome or not handsome Bill Gates is, but everyone wants to comment on how Oprah is looking older and older these days. Male rappers can have F-ed up teeth, hideous clothes, and protruding stomachs covered in tattoos (gag), but current female rappers must fit a certain sexy mold. A woman can be politically, creatively, and monetarily successful, but at the same time,  she is always expected to look pretty.

But feeling the pressure to be beautiful all the time is exhausting. More important than feeling pretty is feeling free—and I can’t feel free if I feel like I can’t walk out of the house until I am perfect.

Two years ago, I was inspired by words from author and autoimmune cooking expert Mee McCormick. Visiting our class one day, she told us, “I don’t get dressed for anyone else.” She explained that when we dress for others, we feel trapped in the many opinions of other people telling us what to wear. There is a freedom that comes with doing things for ourselves.

That element of freedom: doing things because you want to do them and not caring what anyone else expects of you kind of reminds me of this:

notasingle

Finally, I have to add: there is more than one way to be pretty. So be pretty or don’t be, but you probably can’t help yourself…you’re always pretty (unless you don’t want to be—then you don’t you don’t have to).

Shout Out: Thanks Erin McKean and Mee McCormick for inspiring this post!

Related posts: On Wanting to be a big Booty Hoe: The Definition of Sexy

Stylish Statements: African Inspired Looks

22 May

African inspired first look

While at Pepperdine, I can’t tell you how many times I heard the phrase “the starving children in Africa.” People would say it all the time whenever they talked about service projects or compared their living situation to that of someone else.

It’s great that people want to alleviate poverty and I’m all for that. Yet, I’d like to think (and I wish other people would realize) that such a large continent with a rich history has more to offer than a locale where we “oh so privileged Americans” can complete our mission trips and do our good deeds.

While so many students at my Alma mater want to help poor children in Africa, I have a different reason for wanting to go: the fashion.

I’m no fashionista, but I am drawn to the bold and bright colors, the intricate patterns, and the unique shapes that I’ve seen from several designers from Africa.

African Inspired Looks

These looks above are all African inspired. The two looks on the right were featured in Essence Magazine in 2010 and are inspired by the Maasai tribe of southern Kenya and Northern Tanzaia. The others are just looks I found on Pintrest and am dying to have.  All the colors and patterns are perfect for summer.

Designers to watch

Loza Maleobho: a New York based designer raised in the U.S and the Ivory Coast.

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See more of her work here.

Aisha Obuobi: the designer of Christie Brown based in Ghana.

Aisha Obuobi

See more of her work here.

Just something to remember next time you go shopping or next time your mind goes right to poverty when you think about African countries.